


When I'm Gone

by arrafrost



Category: Deadpool (Comics), Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Birthday Presents, Dildos, Dirty Talk, M/M, Phone Sex, Sex Toys, Something for when Wade isn't there
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-07
Updated: 2013-02-07
Packaged: 2017-11-28 13:03:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,973
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/674689
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arrafrost/pseuds/arrafrost
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Wade gets Peter something incredibly personal for his birthday, for special occasions when the merc isn’t around to pleasure him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	When I'm Gone

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into 中文 available: [When I'm Gone（中文翻译）](https://archiveofourown.org/works/5960854) by [Lwnixndk](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lwnixndk/pseuds/Lwnixndk)



> Birthday present for my lovely editor Sammy (which is why it's un-beta'd)

Peter was sitting on the couch with his eyes closed, his hands extended, and a rather uneasy feeling in his stomach.

He had woken up that morning to a merc with a mouth that was rather close to his own mouth, greeted with a kiss, and promptly hauled into the bed for birthday shower sex. Loud, obnoxious, birthday shower sex that was actually a delightfully pleasant way to start the day.

As he dried off and got dressed, he had heard suspicious noises from his kitchen in the apartment he shared with his best friend Harry – thankfully away on business. He tried to ignore them but soon found himself hobbling out of the bedroom attempting to shove his other leg into the jeans that were only half on his body.

Pancakes. Several. Pancakes. So many pancakes that Wade must have made the majority of them  _before_ shower sex and was now adorning them with whipped cream and strawberries. Wade made a joke about wanting to eat the toppings off Peter and as Peter sat down, he knew that it wasn’t a joke and that was likely to happen towards the end of whatever plans Wade had exactly.

Which was how Peter got here. On his couch. As Wade dropped his finely wrapped present into Peter’s hands. The wrapping paper rustled, Peter’s hands wrapped around it and he paused, head tilting in confused recognition at the shape of the object now resting in his palms.

“Wade?”

“Yeah?”

“Did you get me a vibrator for my birthday?”

“Not a vibrator. It’s a dildo. There’s a difference.”

Peter sighed loudly and let his body sink back into the couch. He had told Wade several times that he didn’t enjoy the idea of sex toys. They were too firm, they were weird and had odd clitoral attachments that meant nothing to anal sex, and they weren’t Wade – though Peter would never  _ever_ tell Wade that he didn’t want a vibrator/dildo because it wasn’t his penis.

“Seriously, unwrap it. You’ll like this one.”

Cautiously, Peter opened one of his eyes, only a sliver to see the sly grin on the merc’s lips as his excited gaze practically willed Satan to give Peter the power to open his present.

“Geez, all right.” Peter rolled his eyes when Wade actually started  _bouncing_  in anticipation. He didn’t pay much attention as he tore the well wrapped paper from the dildo, throwing the garbage next to him on the couch. It wasn’t until the thing was fully unwrapped did Peter notice something… odd about the silicone penis.

He blinked. He stared at it. He moved it around in his hands. He squeezed it. He blinked again.

“Wade?”

“Yes?” Was the eager response of his boyfriend who must have known what Peter was going to ask him.

“Did you get me  _your_ penis?”

“Yes!” Wade rolled onto the balls of his feet, happily glancing between the silicone replica – exact replica actually – of his own penis and Peter’s perturbed yet fascinated face. “I made the mold myself.”

“I should hope so…” Peter somehow managed to mutter and still he couldn’t manage to pry his gaze away from the dildo version of his boyfriend’s penis. “Why?”

“I go away a lot and I know you get lonely but you never masturbate properly when I get home and as much as I love pent up sexually frustrated Spidey. I should be taking care of you even when I’m not here to do it – soooooo now you can fuck yourself properly because I actually have to go tonight. Big mission and I hope that’s okay because I know it’s your birthday but I’ll technically still be here – in a way – to give you more mind blowing sex.”

Peter shook his head. It took a moment to process, the rambles of his boyfriend often did that – though usually he sounded like he was having a conversation with two other people that Peter didn’t have the liberty of hearing.

“Oh.” Was all he could say. Sure he was disappointed that Wade was leaving but he did recall Gwen wanting to take him out on the town for his birthday or something, so he could find other ways to spend his birthday – social ways rather than rampant sex in the bedroom which was usually what he was doing anyway, when he wasn’t fighting crime or studying at least. Wade took up a surprisingly large portion of his free time.

“Is that… okay?”

Peter didn’t notice Wade shifting uneasily. For as violent and complete inability to understand other’s emotions, Wade was a rather clingy boyfriend. He was the one that insisted this was his home, pushed the constant nights of staying over that basically led to him living here without paying rent – which on more than one occasion pissed Harry off – and when the gay marriage law was passed Wade had tried to drag him to city hall.

“You got me your penis. For my birthday.”

“Um… yes. Made, given, acknowledged, all that’s left is using but you can’t do that until I’m gone – if it’s okay that I go.”

“Oh yeah… you can go later. Definitely. Gwen has plans that don’t involve your penis.”

That took Wade off guard for a moment. “Well I should hope so! I mean she does have a fine ass but- with that glare Spidey your ass just doubled in sexy. It was always sexy but  _damn!_ ”

.

.

The pancakes were consumed, several of which were not eaten off of plates but Wade and Peter’s bodies instead because Wade thought it was sexier and meant more birthday shower sex before he had to leave. Peter went out with Gwen and a few other friends for his birthday at a nice restaurant. The unimpressed waiter sang Happy Birthday and after few cake, Peter went back to his apartment and thanked everyone for a good time.

That was when he found himself alone with Wade’s penis. Which was such an odd concept. It was as though someone had detached Wade’s penis and… grotesque was all Peter could say about it.

Though it was a gift. That Wade had put a lot of thought and effort into. And Peter was horny.

He bit his lip as he gazed down at the replicated penis sitting on the bed between his legs. His phone rang.

Promptly, he flipped it open, pressed it to his cheek and muttered, “Hey Wade.”

“ _Use it yet?”_

“About to.” Which he probably had been, let’s be honest.

“ _Really? Let me listen!”_

Peter sighed, unsure of this phone sex idea. He never had been good at it.

“ _You don’t have to say anything, just let me listen.”_

“Fine…” Peter groaned, reaching over to the night stand to grab some lube.

“ _Two fingers, you’re pretty loose from today.”_

“You made sure of that didn’t you?”

“ _Yup.”_ No shame in his tone as he listened eagerly on the other line from hell knows where in the world he had run away to.

Peter followed his instructions and eased his two lubed fingers into his stretched hole. It still burned with a bit of pain but it quickly subsided as he increased his thrusts, fucking himself on his fingers until he felt sufficiently slick.

“ _Put it in. Slowly.”_

He groaned, pulling his fingers free and whining at the emptiness it presented him but set his mind to lubing up the dildo. It was surreal. Running his hands along the fake penis that felt exactly like Wade’s cock, only colder. It wasn’t warm and pulsing in his hands. Nor was it attached to a particularly demanding mercenary either.

“ _Feels just like me doesn’t it?_ ”

“Not really…” Peter mumbled even though he wasn’t telling the whole truth. It did feel a lot like Wade’s cock. Enough that it was hard not to picture him right there on the bed with him. Though Peter knew that if Wade wasn’t on the phone with him, the fake penis wouldn’t be creating that realistic of an image in his mind.

“ _Push it in.”_

Leaning back on his pillows, Peter let the head of the cock sink in, gasping on the size that was perfectly Wade.

“ _Just like that.”_ Wade purred on the other end of the phone, as though he could see what Peter was doing. Probably could. Probably set up cameras when Peter wasn’t looking. The pervert.  _“Deeper.”_

Peter moaned as he pushed Wade’s cock further into himself, his hips involuntarily rising to meet it. It felt like him. So much like him that he could hear the whine in the back of his throat when Wade wasn’t covering his body with his own, wasn’t nipping at his throat, wasn’t fanning his fingers across his chest, it was only a part of Wade and Peter hated himself for how head over heels he was for the stupid mercenary that thrust himself into his life.

“ _Faster. You can do it. Don’t hold back.”_

It wasn’t hard for him to pick up the pace. He rocked himself on the cock that he worked into his ass, rotated his wrist to get a good twist on it. Did the best he could having little experience in sex toys in the first place. He wasn’t able to keep the same rhythm that Wade took, the one he became accustomed to, but his cock fit him in all the right places – if that made any sense. Reached where Wade reached, hit his prostate in much the same way, causing an obscene moan to roll off Peter’s lips.

“ _Good. You’re doing so good for me Pete. Fucking yourself on my cock. You want it so much don’t you?”_

Peter whined again, his thrusts moving faster at Wade’s words even as he shook his head in protest. “No. No… I want you.” He gasped, pushing down harder onto the silicone dildo, wishing it was Wade fucking him. Wanting to be held down the way he allowed Wade to hold him down and pound into him relentlessly. That was want he wanted.

“ _Jesus.”_ Was all Wade was able to say between the loud breaths he was taking on the other end of the phone. He was jerking himself off to Peter fucking himself on a fake version of his cock. That thought was hotter than any toy Wade could buy him and he wrapped his other hand around his dick that was pumping precum onto his stomach.

“Fuck Wade! Want you, want you here…” Peter gritted his teeth, fucking himself harder with the dildo and gripping himself tighter as he rocked up into his own palm.

“ _That’s it. Come for me, Pete. Scream for me.”_

Peter did. He shouted as his ass clenched around the toy in his ass and he stroked himself harder as he came all over his stomach and chest. He collapsed against the bed, exhausted and lazily pulling the dildo from his ass he filled Wade’s ear with content moans.

Wade supplied a filthy grunt of his own as he came, Peter’s name hush on his lips.

Their hot breaths filled the phone for several minutes, Peter verging on the edge of sleep, Wade quiet and contemplative for once.

“ _That was hot._ ”

“Mm…” Peter agreed, eyes fluttering closed as he curled up into the pillow that smelled the most like Wade.

“ _Want to do it again tomorrow?”_

Peter chuckled, a soft smile gracing his lips. He was ready to fall asleep with the phone still on like he usually did when Wade was away. He’d let the merc talk his ear off until he finally realized Peter wasn’t conscious anymore and continued talking anyway because that’s what he did when he was alone on a mission and would finally hang up when he was tired enough to ready to go kill someone for money.

“Yeah… good plan.”

**Author's Note:**

> Read more Spideypool on my [tumblr](http://arrafrost.tumblr.com/masterpost)


End file.
